I won't do too much of an introduction, since the only thing you need to know before reading is that I'm on vacation and I'm gonna document it to the best of my ability. I've done it once, I'll do it again! And that's a threat!
Starting off any road trip comes with some baggage. That's a great one-liner, I could probably call it a day just from that.
I'm already derailed.
Unscathed and unbroken. SFO cant take us down.
That's what San Francisco has done to me. Already, after hardly 16 hours in, there's been a jolt of energy and a whirlwind of free expression. One person dressed up like a leprechaun, someone trying to sell hot dogs and buy weed simultaneously, a man with only a tubesock on his genetalia. If I'm being honest, I only missed CSM (Cock sock man, for short) since I was taking notes one all the other crazy shit that Tucker Carlson warned me about.
And that was just coming from the airport!
I arrived at Cousin Jean's 1-bedroom apartment. It's cute, and clean. A gracious host, she gifted us a basket of stolen snacks from her office building. I dont want to give away where she works, so let's just say shes a big designer for Myspace. Her break room hooks it up, and we're set for snacks for the whole week. Thanks, Jean from Myspace!
We arrived later than planned, 1pm opposed to the night prior, so we made quick work of some lunch and ubered over to the highly anticipated 4/20 festival over at hippie park. Let me get it out now, it was pretty terrible. Just imagine, a music festival in San Francisco. Micro climates bless this area with Poseidon-wrath-level winds while still 54 degrees, sunny and humid.
Then the people, oh man. Not that there were any bad players; I'm sure a few of them were stinky, for instance, but they were drowned out by the constant cloud of weed smoke. It was the quantity that bummed me out. Massive numbers of stoned dorks waddled their way passed security checks, with guards so serious as to check my ID and tell me to "come through." My party and I were remaining optimistic, we ubered here after all, but our confidence drained in steep and staggered steps as we more heavily explored the pop-up pot-stop. Food trucks with lines longer than the biggest doink you've ever seen. Huge crowds for a DJ playing dubstep remixes of Blink-182 songs. It wasn't just us not having a good time, either. I didnt see one person smile, except the "vendors" selling prerolled joints to the anxious masses. Those guys were having a blast making stacks. Everyone else just looked like they were too high to be there, sweet irony.
People had looks on their faces like their uncles funeral was crashed by a biker gang. This was a sad and chaotic affair, the magnum opus of a newly corporate 4/20 culture. It was just too many damn people, and the only non-entrepreneurs enjoying themselves must have come for the guy spinning skrillex and "All the Small Things"
Luckily, we are our own people and had no obligation to stay. Unluckily, we got stuck in some crazy traffic for like 45 minutes afterwards with a silent uber driver in a silent car. We made the most of it, though, by constantly dunking on the the free weed-festival AKA Coachella on chemotherapy.
Only smiling cause she has coffee
And you know what? After that we found our stride. We took a bit of a scenic walk, our first of many, and got a taste of why San Fran is so loved. I felt like I was breathing in a new flavor of creative inspiration, which I did a lot of while I huffed and puffed up it's stupid ass hills.
Most of the conversations were about the weather, a topic usually reserved for awkward small talk but in SF it's a way of life. Weather patterns, pressure systems, it's all fascinating. I mean, I still understand nothing about it other than that I should always wear my jeans. That's all that matters, right?
After exploring some less-populated hills and trails, we decided to call it an early night. We'd been up for a while and had an active enough travel day, so kicking it at the apartment with some beers and Indian food sounded just fine to me.
Today's agenda is pretty active too... I won't list it since we're probably going to need ti adapt, and God forbid I spread false info on the internet. I'm looking forward to taking more pictures of our silly little trip, and I hope you all get a kick out of it too.
Till tomorrow!
(Small photo dump)
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